So some automated shit-bot sent me an email today with a link to the rider times for the Sportive that Carlos, Phil and I did yesterday. Bang in my surname and I see that I am awarded Bronze for my efforts. I finished 3rd? No. These are categories determined by your average speed and total time. It transpires that unless you get Gold or Silver everyone gets Bronze. Prizes for all; broken Britain. However, it is possible to copy/paste all of everybody’s times into a spreadsheet and sift through the data. I love a spreadsheet – who doesn’t love a spreadsheet? – and it turns out that of the 180 riders that competed in the ‘Short’ category, 2 were categorised as ‘Gold’, 10 ‘Silver’ and then 26 places and 15 minutes behind them, the 3 amigos. So, we’re in the first quartile, the top 25% and that makes it feel better. Certainly better than Mr Christian Egal who finished over 3 and a half hours later. But still got ‘Bronze’.
And Phil definitely does shave his legs.